Snippets of a Single Father I

I : Sundae Brine

The girls were in our tiny living room watching Max & Ruby. I heard them talking about silly little girl things. They had so kindly helped me clean up after dinner, giggling the whole time, that I wanted to give them a surprise. They were of that age that it didn’t take much to make the smallest thing extraordinary to them.

I had gone to the store to get bananas, chocolate syrup, sprinkles and ice cream. It was to be a Sundae night on this Tuesday night. 

“Don’t come in here!” I knew they wouldn’t but felt saying it would heighten their anticipation.

“We’re not!” I loved when they spoke in unison like that. They giggled and returned to their discussion.

I split the bananas and put them in the three bowls I had laid out on the counter. For some arbitrary reason I thought of our old house and how we ended up living here, in this tiny place above a garage.

I shook my head violently from side to side and broke pieces of milk chocolate and placed them in the split of the banana as a surprise for when they dug in. I thought about how small it was here. How embarrassing it probably was for the girls when their friends came over.

“It’s almost ready!” I had discovered that I often involuntarily did or said things to distract myself from difficult thoughts when they started flying around in my head.

They spoke again in unison, “We can’t wait!” Again they giggled.

I had bought two of their favorites, chocolate chip cookie dough and cookies and cream. I scooped one healthy ball of each and placed them on the split bananas. I just wanted them to be happy. To somehow make up for all the horrible things they had been through. They were too young to have gone through this.

“I hope you guys like anchovies!”

“Ew, Papa!”

I then very slowly poured the chocolate syrup zigzagging across each ice cream scoop and the bananas. All their little girl dreams had been shattered, crushed and stolen. I poured the syrup more slowly. I felt something tickling my cheek. After the short trip down my aged face the tear fell into the ice cream.

“Anchovies it is!” They giggled even more loudly.

I finished the syrup, plopped some whipped cream on top, sprinkled the sprinkles and ended it all with a cherry on top. I was just going to do my best. It was all I could do. I knew I could never get us back to what once was, but I would work hard every day to try to make their lives as good as I possibly could.

I suspected there would be a lot of Sundaes with brine in our future, but knew it would all be worth it if I could even partly make up for what they went through. To make them strong. To give them hope. To smile and laugh.

Another tear was trickling down my cheek again. I wiped it away, grabbed the two best looking bowls and headed to our tiny living room. “Surprise!”